Sometimes when I’m driving through the countryside, I have the most peculiar thing wash over me. It is an inexplicable yearning for things that I know not. It hits me unexpectedly, perhaps when I see a particularly lovely home that is well situated, or perhaps a rolling field with a barn and animals.
It is almost as if there is a longing inside of me for the life that could have been mine, but wasn’t. There are so many paths each of us may choose and different forks along the way. We dream of where we want to end up and do our best to get there, but it doesn’t always work out the way we had hoped.
I often wonder about the people behind the walls of houses in strange neighborhoods. Are they happy? What do they do for a living? Is there love in their household? How many children do they have? How do they spend their time?
Sometimes I think the luckiest people in the world are the ones who live at the head of a hollow, or on the edge of some remote lake, or in the wilderness. The ones they love are close around them, their daily necessities and chores lie before them, and they are happier in the process of daily living than the rest of us – or so it seems.
My dreams and my reality are certainly two very different things at this point, but I haven’t given up dreaming.
The Bible speaks of deep calling unto deep. I wonder if that feeling applies to my longing for things I cannot put a name to, things that are drawing me that I cannot see.
The melancholy yearnings of my heart most often speak to me of what might have been but was not… of the dreams I dreamed that someone else has taken over… of the unseen places I have yet to discover.
The Bible speaks of yearnings and longings of our soul.
Psalms 63:1 says, “O God, You are my God; I shall seek You earnestly; My soul thirsts for You, my flesh yearns for You, In a dry and weary land where there is no water.”
Psalm 143:6 – “I stretch out my hands to You; My soul longs for You, as a parched land.”
Isaiah 26: 9 – “At night my soul longs for You, Indeed, my spirit within me seeks You diligently;”
Psalm 84:2 – “My soul yearns, even faints, for the courts of the LORD; my heart and my flesh cry out for the living God.”
Perhaps the yearning that I feel is for eternity, where I will be forever in the presence of God and all things will be put right. We are, after all, only pilgrims and strangers in this earth, created for a higher destiny than this world has to offer.